It's the most difficult time of the year!

It's the holidays!  For many of us that means fun, family, excitement, and some stress.

For many of my students that just means stress - more alcohol and drug use by them or others, how to get presents for younger siblings when money's tight, uncomfortable family times, more violence at home, more being home alone, more people in the house, more unpredictable behaviors, more guilt for not being happy, more tears and sadness and loneliness.

Mary came in one day very panicked and upset:  Dad had announced she would bake the Thanksgiving turkey this year.  She was on her own to figure it out.  We did a lesson on text structure, including sequence and cause/effect and reviewed cooking turkeys and other traditional foods. 

In his "What I did over break" paper, Tarrell said that he was crying Christmas morning, because he missed his brother who had died two years ago.  His dad came to his room and told him "cut it out and get dressed."

One year I had five students who were spending their first holiday season without significant loved ones and they weren't suppose to talk about it, because it might make Mom cry.

Julie hates the holidays because her uncle always visits.  He is creepy and tries to be alone with her.  She spends most of her holiday at a friend's house or right next to her parents.

I don't ignore the holidays.  We always do holiday related stories and articles.  Among those are articles on dealing with stress and what causes stress at the holidays.  Challenging behaviors can increase, because there are too many emotions going on and they spill out. Acknowledge the hard parts and the emotions.  Use stories to talk about it and let them write about it.  Be compassionate when they have a hard day.

Be sensitive.  The best advice I ever got for the holidays was "find a rut and stay in it".  Have fun, but don't do too much that's new and different.  Stability is very calming and reassuring.